Category Archives: Marriage

The Wedding Part 6

25 Monday Jun 2012

Posted by in Life in Africa, Marriage, My Journey

≈ Leave a comment

Image

On June 7th, 1986 we were joined in marriage at the First Baptist Church of Friendswood, Texas. We were the first couple to be Wed in the beautiful white, victorian Gazebo under the great oak tree built in memory of Dot Wilden’s beloved husband. Money was tight for us both so it really had be put together on a shoestring budget. At the home of the Duffer’s we had a magical night at our Hawaiian Luau following our dress rehearsal the night before the wedding. Jerry Duffer performed the ceremony 18 years later came to work with us in Botswana! Rachel Burchfield told a story as she did “The Commissioning” to Africa as an important part of the ceremony. She told of how, when I was a teenager I had spent the night and was having a quiet time with God. I came out and said to her, “God spoke to me!!” She said, “What did he say?” With great excitement I shared that God told me my life was going to be a life of perseverance, and that he was going to teach me perseverance. Her eyes got big and I said, “By the way, what is perseverance?” So has my life been in many, many ways as we have learned to stick with it through thick and thin!

We had a beautiful wedding and God pieced together every detail, including the pearls lovingly sewn on my wedding dress by family friends and my Texas-style hat. It was so wonderful to see so many people pull together to make it an unforgettable event. The wedding planner and family friend, Geri Hart Duffer helped coordinate flowers, music, cake, food, photos, presents, potpourri and friends. So many amazing people in our lives helped make that day unforgettable. .

When we recently celebrated our 25 year wedding anniversary, we looked back in awe at the wonderful gift the Lord has given us in one another and so many people who have been a part of our lives to help us to fulfill His calling in much greater ways than we had ever imagined.

We made a promise never to say the “D” word, (divorce). We’ve had our share of struggles as two people with very strong wills and ideas. But when placed in the Lord’s hands, He can do wonders with our flaws and weave them into a wonderful tapestry of destiny for His glory!

The Wedding Album

08 Tuesday May 2012

Posted by in Inspirational Thoughts, Life in Africa, Marriage, Trials to Triumph

≈ 1 Comment

ImageIn June 17, 1997 a fire destroyed our house and all of our personal effects gathered over 10 years of working in Botswana. There are many amazing things to share about what all came out of that but for now, one special story I would like to relate is about our wedding photos. I started looking for the man who took the photos when I was in Houston but was told that he and his wife had moved to the Texas Hill country upon retirement. Donna was one of my spiritual mom’s during the early days of my Christian walk and I attended all the Women’s Aglow meeting I could get to in between school. Fred McCreary was active in ministry in addition to his job at NASA. I attended faithfully as a teen getting all I could from the wave of the move of God in the 70’s.

It was 1997 and I was attending an International Aglow conference in New Orleans. While I was going up a 2 story escalator, with my 2 year old, Mason, I heard the Lord in my heart say to me, “turn around”. So when I reached the top, I did, and I saw the back of a lady’s head in the middle of the huge crowd of thousands of women who had come from all over the world. , Then I heard, “That’s Donna McCreary!” I bolted down the escalator with baby in tow and made my way through the crowd until I reached her. I tapped her on the shoulder and sure enough, it was her! I spent many hours in her home as a teen with her kids and she recognized me right away. We hugged, had a time of reunion and then I told her about the fire and all we had been through. I told her I had tried to reach them to see if perhaps they had kept the negatives of our wedding because we had lost all in the fire. She informed me that they had gotten rid of all of that when they moved and was so sorry. 

She invited our family to visit them in their new home on the river in the Texas hill country. Our trip got really full and when she phoned me to see if we were coming, she told me,” We really want you all to come. I really think it will be worth your while.” So we made the drive out on our way through the vast state of Texas. People ask me what country I am from sometimes in Africa and I till them- From Texas! Botswana is roughly the same size as Texas.

We all disembarked from the packed out mini-van we were driving and managed to get to the front door with the all 3 boys. We were warmly greeted and asked to sit down and have a cup of coffee before unpacking the car for the night. As we sipped our coffee, Fred sat down and said how sorry he was that they had not kept the negatives for our wedding. They just did not have space in the move for all those things. He worked for NASA for years and did photography on the side. He was very good at it. That was just another thing the Lord did for us on our wedding- was to use Fred and Donna to bless us with quality photos. He said, “But though we didn’t have space for the negatives, I did keep one thing”…and he pulled out an album and placed it before us on the glass table. It was worn and looked just like the one we lost. I was confused for a moment, and when I opened the page, I was even more confused. Jerry sat beside me in utter amazement and surprise. He said, “Jana, these are our wedding pictures!” Fred went on to tell us that because our wedding was so unique and the pictures turned out so well, he made a copy for himself as a demo to show his work! He said, It’s yours if you want it!! Of course we said, “yes”! His album had even MORE pictures in it than our own album had.

That album is tucked away in my oak hope chest in Houston, Texas for safe keeping! What a wonderful God we have to remember even the smallest detail of our lives. That was a very special reminder from the Father on that day! To view it you can friend me on facebook to see it.

The Couple Part 6: The Wedding

06 Sunday May 2012

Posted by in Life in Africa, Marriage, My Journey, The Call

≈ Leave a comment

On June 7th, 1986 we were joined in marriage at the First Baptist Church of Friendswood, Texas. We were the first couple to be Wed in the beautiful white, victorian Gazebo under the great oak tree built in memory of Dot Wilden’s Imagebeloved husband. Money was tight for us both so it really had be put together on a shoestring budget. At the home of the Duffer’s we had a magical night at our Hawaiian Luau following our dress rehearsal the night before the wedding. Jerry Duffer performed the ceremony 18 years later came to work with us in Botswana! Rachel Burchfield told a story as she did “The Commissioning” of us as a couple to Africa as an important part of the ceremony. She told of how, when I was a teenager I had spent the night and was having a quiet time with God. I came out and said to her, “God spoke to me!!” She said, “What did he say?” With great excitement I shared that God told me my life was going to be a life of perseverance, and that he was going to teach me perseverance. Her eyes got big and I said, “By the way, what is perseverance?” So has my life been in many, many ways as we have learned to stick with it through thick and thin!

We had a beautiful wedding and God pieced together every detail, including the pearls lovingly sewn on my wedding dress and Texas-style hat. It was so wonderful to see so many people pull together to make it an unforgettable event. Flowers, music, cake, food, photos, presents potpourri and friends were all given by the amazing people in our lives.

When we celebrated our 20 year wedding anniversary, we looked back in awe at the wonderful gift the Lord has given us in one another to fulfill His calling in much greater ways than we had ever imagined.Image

We made a promise never to say the “D” word, (divorce). We’ve had our share of struggles as two people with very strong wills and ideas. But when placed in the Lord’s hands, He can do wonders with our flaws and weave them into a wonderful tapestry of destiny for His Glory!

The Couple Part 5: She’s mine!

27 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by in Marriage, My Journey, The Early Days

≈ 5 Comments

Once we established where we would meet up, I took off and found him waiting next to his sporty, red, convertible  MG. We drove around trying to find a place to eat besides the 24 hour Denny’s since it was so late, we opted for desert at a favorite coffee house. I was pretty stiff and not talkative at all. He could sense something was wrong, poor guy! I started wishing I had not been so ice cold when he suggested we go back to my apartment because he also had a tradition. He told me that he, too, got alone with God to be with Him to see the new year in! Well, I had a nudge that said, “Go for it!”  So, we arrived at my place, went over to the love seat, (wink), and on our knees went to our Creator in prayer. We spent some time just worshiping God when Jerry gently put his arm around my shoulder and said these words that started us on a more defined path. “Lord, I thank you for showing me that I need Jana in my life. Lord help us to serve you together wherever you lead us.”

That was it! That was the point in time my mama told me about. “When he commits, it will be because he has decided that this is what he wants and it will be quick from there, you just watch.”  He later told me that he had intended to stay “Single for God” and go to Africa unattached. After that night, everything changed. I was his gal. And everyone knew it. Even the way he walked with me was different. He wanted everyone to know, we were a pair. Grant it, there were some presuming girls who weren’t too happy about that and one even tried to sabotage it! But nothing was going to deter us from the path we were on!

ImageThat February Jerry proposed to me at a nice, romantic, candle-lit dinner at an Italian restaurant called Birraporetti’s. Inside the desert menu was a little card that opened up with cut out letters from newspaper magazines that read, “Jana G. will you marry me?” Then a beautiful diamond ring was presented to me in the box with longing eyes and a big smile from the most handsome man I knew! It’s no guess what my answer was! Yes! We enjoyed a nice desert and then I was greeted at the car on the way out with 2 dozen red roses to show this was no joke! It was more than this young woman had ever dreamed of in a proposal! Now it was official. I was his!

The Couple Part 4: The Runaway Bride

26 Monday Mar 2012

Posted by in Marriage, My Journey, The Early Days

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , ,

Before I met Jerry, I started trudging through the book “Passion for Purity” by Elisabeth Elliott. She is the widow to Jim Elliot whoImage was one of the martyrs who was murdered by the Auca Indians in the jungles of the Amazon in the late 50’s. Their story was not one I was relishing. She had to wait for him for many years before getting even a commitment of marriage-and all the while, remaining pure in their relationship. In my heart of hearts, it was easier to blow this thing off completely than to have to dangle my heart out there in limbo-land while Jerry was busy making up his mind! I purposed to finish the book that evening and then get my answer from God. I had a tradition from the time I was 14 years old, the year I gave my whole life to the Lord. I would go somewhere to be alone at midnight on new Year’s eve and allow the Lord to speak to me things about the coming year and to pray the new year in with the Lover of my soul, Jesus.

I decided I would do just that as it was the appropriate day for it, and after all, I was making good money in my job and could afford it the nice, $50 room at the Hilton. As I settled in, I first called my mom and told her where I was and what I was doing- not that I had basically “run away from home” (a home where I lived alone and could have just locked the door!!) I then called my answering service, the thing we had before cell phones, and told them not to, under any circumstances give out my number where I was. I knew Jerry would be calling after work, like he did most every day to see what was happening and could we get together and hang out. I was just very frustrated that he had come to expect me to be “available” and felt he should have made more plans and “invited me” out to dinner that night, since it was such a special day after all. The underlying frustration was that I wanted to know for sure if this was the man I was going to marry, otherwise, I wanted to get on with my life and God’s plan for me!

I nestled up onto the bed of that nice, posh, quiet hotel room and finished reading the last of “Passion for Purity”. I then proceeded to the floor in my most spiritual stance I could muster. Bowed down before God, I cried out to him, “OH God! Show me Lord, Is Jerry the man you have for me?” At that moment, the sweet presence of the Lord came down and His still, small voice spoke to me and said, “Jana, be faithful to him as a friend.” Just as quickly as it came, it lifted and left me feeling anything but sweet! I said, “That’s it! That’s all you have to say to me? You mean I paid $50 to hear you say that?!” I heard what I already knew. To be a faithful friend to Jerry. And to wait. Not to run away, but to allow myself to be vulnerable at a time when it would have been easier to forget the whole thing. It has a horrible, miserable, grueling time- waiting for answers about this man!

Angrily, I plopped up on the bed, all spiritual goose-bumps and sense of anointing out the window! I turned on the TV and miserably sat and started watching an old movie when the phone rang. Now originally, I had wanted to make Jerry suffer and wonder where on earth I was! That’s why I told the answering service not to tell “anyone” my whereabouts or numbers. I was beginning to regret that move and as I sat alone watching tv, the phone rang and it was Jerry. He said, “Jana, what are you doing?” I said very smugly, “Oh, I decided to get away and spend some time with the Lord for New Year’s Eve.” Yeah right! I was miserable! “How did you get my number?” He told me the answering service gave it to him. Jerry Lackey can sell ice to an Eskimo! That’s just how he is.

He didn’t ask where I was (though only much later, did I realize when they answered the phone, they said, “Hilton, may I help you”. I can only imagine what he must have thought when he realized where I was. We had a pure relationship-something that is possible by the grace of God! He asked me, “Don’t you want to go get something to eat?” I very curtly said, “Well, I guess so. But I would rather come to where you are and we can meet and go from there.” Aware of appearances of evil and all you know! After all, I was in a hotel room!